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Welcome to the Bendover show once again and this week we're swimming into yummy mummy territory.

Oh yes, we've got a beautiful yummy mummy all the way from the Welsh Valleys, don't you know.

So, drag out your Max Boyce, your Shirley Bassey and your Tom Jones albums, stick them all on at once

because we're going to have a good time. She wants to be a bluebird babe and a Bendover slut.

Is that the right way of saying that? Slut!